Clean Pain vs Dirty Pain (Job Loss, Negative Feedback, etc)

By
Hannah Kissel
July 15, 2025
19
min
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About the episode

In this episode of the Big F*cking Dreams podcast, Life Coach Hannah Kissel explores the concepts of clean pain and dirty pain, derived from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. She discusses how clean pain is an inevitable part of life, while dirty pain arises from our reactions to clean pain, often leading to rumination and self-judgment. Hannah provides insights into coping strategies for managing these types of pain, emphasizing the importance of emotional regulation and communication in both personal and professional contexts. She also highlights the need for emotional literacy to better navigate our feelings and responses.

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Key Takeaways:

  • Clean pain is inevitable and part of life.
  • Dirty pain arises from our reactions to clean pain.
  • Emotional regulation is crucial for personal and professional success.
  • Feedback should be specific to be effective.
  • Leaders must provide actionable examples when giving feedback.
  • Understanding your emotional responses can prevent spiraling into dirty pain.
  • Practicing emotional literacy helps in managing pain.
  • Turning toward discomfort can lead to better coping strategies.
  • Self-awareness is key to emotional regulation.
  • Communication is essential in addressing feedback and improving relationships.

I'm Hannah

Executive Coach, columnist, podcaster, and speaker.

My mission is to help high-performing leaders become more confident, successful, and fulfilled in thier careers.

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